Uncle Walt

Walter Cronkite, to Larry King, on the bin Laden videotape: "I'm a little inclined to think that Karl Rove, the political manager at the White House, who is a very clever man, he probably set up bin Laden to this thing."
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You might, at first glance, think that this just proves that creeping senility and dementia have caused the one-time Chief of the American Desk of the NVA / VC Propaganda Bureau (a.k.a, the CBS Evening News anchor) to slide even more deeply into the anti-American Michael Moore Looney Left wing of the Democratic Party.

But, as it turns out, he may be right, much as I hate to admit it. It looks like Karl Rove WAS behind the bin Laden tape – in fact, CBS just procured a damning telephone transcript that appears to support Cronkite’s charge. It was faxed to them by a guy who said he was a credible source, so Dan Rather confirms it’s legit. Here it is:


(Ring . . . . . . Ring . . . . . . Ring . . .)

ObL: Hello?

Rove: Yes, hello. May I speak to Osama, please?

ObL: Speaking. How may I help you?

Rove: Hey, Osama! It’s Karl . . . Karl Rove!

ObL: Hey Karl. What’s up?

Rove: Aw, pretty busy here, as you might imagine. Got a tight race goin’ on right now. You may have heard.

ObL: Yes, it seems to be going right down to the wire, for sure.

Rove: So, what’s up with you these days?

ObL: Oh, same ol’ same ol’. Working to destroy the Great Satan. Making plans to have the streets of your cities run red with rivers of infidel blood. The usual.

Rove: Yeah, I hear ya. Hey, gettin’ back to our election race over here. Would you consider doing us a big favor?

ObL: I suppose so. What is it?

Rove: Would you mind doing a video tape for us? And maybe release it, oh, right before the election?

ObL: Sure, Karl. What do you want me to put in it?

Rove: Well, you know. Put in all the Democratic talking points. Make references to Fahrenheit 9/11. Put in a bunch of Michael Moore stuff. That sort of thing. Think you could do that for us?

ObL: Yes, we could do that. Just one problem, though.

Rove: What’s that?

ObL: Your airstrikes the other day. They took out our last remaining video camera.

Rove: You don’t say?!! Wow - came pretty close to gettin’ you with one of those, did we? Well, whaddya know! . . . . . . Say, uh, . . . which . . . uh . . . airstrike was it? If you don’t mind me asking.

ObL: Well . . . I don’t really want to comment on that one, Karl. But we are without a video camera now.

Rove: Hey, that’s no problem. I can have my people send you a replacement right away. Which, uh, cave should we deliver it to?

ObL: Oh . . . you don’t need to worry about that. I’ll just have a courier pick it up.

Rove: Well . . . OK. Sure. Your call. Just, well, you know . . . . wanted to save you some trouble there.

ObL: Right. So - when can you get that camera to us?

Rove: How’s close of business tomorrow sound? Think you can turn around a video by the end of October if we do that?

ObL: Of course. Consider it done. Anything else we can do for you?

Rove: Naw, that should do it. We’d really be grateful.

ObL: No problem.

Rove: Thanks! Please pass on my regards to your wives.

ObL: Same here – best to the missus.

Rove: I’ll pass that on to her. Take care now!

ObL: Bye.

(Click)

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So - Uncle Walt is on it! You know what they say – even a broken clock is right twice a day.